I know that restriction is the last thing one might believe is a major cause of weight gain and even obesity… But studies show that the diet cycle, which is based on restricting calories or major food groups such as fat and carbohydrates causes destructive eating patterns based on starvation and binge cycles.

Most problematic and compulsive eaters will tell you that EVERY TIME they have restricted in some way, there was a binge waiting around the corner- maybe not that hour, or even that same day…but it happens.

In this short video I offer 3 tips to avoid restriction when working with clients who suffer from weight gain, binge cycles or obesity…and they may not be what you think!

I look forward to hearing your thoughts below!

If you think you might be a compulsive overeater, take the quiz here to find out!

http://emergingjewel.com/quiz-are-you-a-compulsive-over-eater/

If you are a health coach who works with weight loss, or someone who suffers with maintaining weight loss…. or are stuck in a destructive cycle with food, join me in watching my video below..

https://youtu.be/3YrrwbSDkeQ

What IS the Cognitive Approach? And WHY is it so necessary to use? Because most people struggle with old though patterns and beliefs that just get in the way- and without having structure to facilitate change in this area, it is easy to go in circles and spiral with clients- and both you and your clients feel depleted…

Stay with me as I explain this process and just HOW the Cognitive Approach works!

For more info on our program starting in March, click here!

http://emergingjewel.com/attention-health-practitioners/

https://youtu.be/UuEtf9I6L68

Please contact me with any questions at all or leave a message here- I would love to hear how you are using this approach in your work or if you are inspired to do so, and what your focus is!  shelley@emergingjewel.com

In Unity,

Shelley :)

Emotional eating can be debilitating. And it can be tough to overcome. Treating and helping an emotional eater is a challenge. It is frustrating when you see your patient fall back on the emotional eating rollercoaster. Chances are, as a practitioner, you’ve struggled to help your patients overcome emotional eating and dieting. Probably few have actually fully recovered. You hate to admit you’re failing and you don’t know why.

You want to help 1000’s of women overcome dieting and move on to the road of health. But something’s missing.

The missing link to helping an emotional eater is to look at their behaviors in a different light. You don’t have the tools to serve an emotional eater and help them recover. 90% of your clients fall into this category. Most of your clients fall into the emotional eater category one way or another.

Here are 5 things you can do to reach out to emotional eaters – to help connect with clients, secure those clients, and see long-term results.

1. Help your clients learn HOW to get on the road to recovery, not just tell them WHAT to do.
2. Teach your clients how to maintain a healthy mindset to eating.
3. Inspire your clients to reach their goals and recovery isn’t a far-off dream.
4. Learn cognitive exercises to use with your clients who are stuck in old eating habits.
5. Market to your ideal clients in a way that resonates and connects with them.

Are you ready to close the missing link between helping your emotional eater client become recovered?

• Here is your secret tip!

An overarching aspect of becoming an effective, competent coach is learning how to think like an empiricist. One of the hallmarks of empowering emotional eaters is teaching the clients themselves to think more empirically.

They THINK WRONG! That is the problem- and in order to empower them to THINK better- you MUST have a formula!

And I have done the work for you!

ALL NEW!  " Breaking Free" Practitioners Training Program! LEARN HOW TO WORK WITH EMOTIONAL EATERS AND EXPAND YOUR REACH! START: MAY 1, 2016

NOTE:

If you have done one of my previous programs, you have an opportunity to "upgrade" at this incredible price!! and receive my recorded group calls as well! Be sure to contact me asap for this limited offer! * You can do this at your OWN PACE! FINALLY up and on DISCOUNT for a limited time, as this is the first time we have launched the new program with so MANY add-ons!

Health Professionals who work with women with eating disorders and/or emotional eating and are looking for a program of recovery- I am sharing my work! Its time to expand your coaching reach and learn how to HEAL Emotional and Compulsive eaters! I have been using this 12 Week Program with great success the past several years and have now published this program but have made it ADAPTABLE for YOUR program! I am training others who would like to learn how to teach their clients how to BREAK FREE of the emotional component (the entire problem) associated with problematic eaters. I know you’re bursting to share your message and expertise in a much BIGGER way! You were born to help 1000’s of people and make a HUGE difference as a Health Ambassador! If you’re like me, growing your coaching business means living your true purpose. Its about waking up every day knowing you are transforming lives longterm in health and you are fulfilling your greatest potential on the planet! Imagine Having… A lucrative, 6 figure Coaching business that serves ANY client that walks in the door A 50,000 annual increase in revenue by expanding your coaching reach to emotional eaters! An easy- to-use proven system to reach Emotional and Compulsive Eaters of all types The freedom to let go of worry and stress associated with clients not “sticking” to the program Deep fulfillment and joy because you’re making the impact you were born for A “done for you” program with all the tools to take your business from mediocre to thriving Easy to use, cognitive exercises to use with clients who are stuck with old eating habits. This is not simply a “psychology or self help program- NOT AT ALL…this is a done for you 12 Week Program that gives you ALL THE TOOLS to facilitate a transformation in your client’s thinking so that they can heal the problematic eating issues. When your clients have all the information and know WHAT to do but not HOW to do it, you need to work on an internal level to shift their black and white thinking so they are able to CHOOSE health. MORE INFO HERE: CLICK: http://emergingjewel.com/attention-health-practitioners/ WATCH MORE HERE!

https://youtu.be/SOZvtuyUt-E

Email me with any questions at all: Shelley@emergingjewel.com

• This is discounted very temporarily!

What has you feeling stuck in your practice with this who cannot follow their plans? How do you handle difficult clients who don't seem to be having success? 

I would love to answer any questions you have on the Cognitive Approach below!

I hope everyone is having a wonderful New Year so far! The New Year is a time of positive life changes and commitments to better yourself and your life.  

2016 is about committing to health instead of a diet. It’s about kicking emotional eating in the butt….for good! 15 years ago I made that decision, and I’ve never been happier or healthier.

I recovered. You can too.

This year choose your well-being over a diet. It’s a BIG decision. But it’s the one that truly matters. As an emotional eater, recovery is possible. Happiness is possible. Being healthy is possible.

Dieting isn’t the answer. You don’t need to be a prisoner of food. You can get healthy WITHOUT obsessing over calories, binge-eating, weighing yourself constantly, and sabotaging your health goals.

It’ll be a challenge, but the best things in life don’t come easily. I’m here to help.

Let’s get you off that emotional eating rollercoaster. You can stop hiding your binge-eating stash. You can finally begin to feel less guilty about eating.

Be free of the scale, of calories, of your weight, and the voice in your head telling you you’re not good enough.

You are capable of breaking free of problematic eating. Food is not the enemy.

Take control of your life. Do whatever it takes to get well. You deserve it.

Please watch my video below on how to stop food cravings…for good! :

https://youtu.be/vnxqrijfxGk

Share your story with me. What’s your biggest struggle as an emotional eater? 

I want to take this time to wish you a very Happy New Year. I want you to know you can have whatever it is you need to feel good every day that you wake up this year. And that you deserve that- every bit of it. Almost 15 years ago, at this time of year I made a decision. I decided I was worth whatever it takes to get well. I decided I was done with being a prisoner to food, and I was ready for change.

I took some very essential steps in making this happen, and today I can say I am FREE. Free of the obsession to binge or hide out with my favourite treat, free of overeating and dieting. Free of being captive to a  life that was about dying..not living.

I want to share this GIFT with you- if you are like me, and you have had enough. If you are ready to have something be different this year- Im here to tell you it IS possible. ..and that something different is inside of you.

I want to share the steps I took to get well, and am offering a discounted rate on the 12 week program for Problematic Eaters for a limited time. If you are ready, I invite you to join us…

WE start January 3rd, but this can be done at your OWN PACE!

I lived for over 15 years in that hell- weighing myself constantly, obsessing about food, failed relationships, nothing that fits, shame, guilt and demoralization… and I decided I had enough. I decided i would do whatever it takes to heal. It wasn't enough for me to just " put down the food". I wanted freedom- real freedom of the mind.

I wanted the juiciest life possible. Today I have that. I don't think about food, weight, or shape. I go to buffets without obsessing what to eat or not eat. I don't weigh myself and I have had the same clothes in my closet for over 15 years. I became a certified nutritionist and wellness counsellor and help other women BREAK FREE as well. I am teaching this work at the Canadian School of Natural Nutrition and it is becoming a " go to" resource for practitioners as well.

If you have had enough, and you want real freedom then I want to reach out. This program is now online and can be done AT YOUR OWN PACE! I am offering it at a discounted price for a limited time.. Men and Women world wide are recovering with this program- it works if you are ready. I am offering a 1:1 consolation to see if this is a fit for you. I want to share the gift I was given. You deserve it. Feel free to contact me here- or check out our programs which are highly interactive and with much depth, and to see what others are saying…

I started working with Shelly the summer of 2014 for my problematic eating. From the first time I spoke with her she “got it” she truly understood what i was struggling with! I’ve tried talking to others in the past but they did not get it like Shelly did! It was such a refreshing change. During her 12 week program she helped me a lot with teaching me about self care, meeting my needs and learning new patterns to break the food cycle. Shelly was always warm and kind, she was available to us whenever we needed her. She really fully got what we were going through and is a great instructor to help break free! Shelly has helped me heal so much already and has lead me in the right direction for further healing. I also wish Shelly all the best in her journey to helping and healing others! Thank you Shelly for caring and the great impact you’ve made on my life and the lives of others. Jenae

I have worked with Shelley one on one and I can say I am officially in recovery from BED. For the first time ever (and I’ve worked with MANY counsellors/therapists) I am getting to the deeper causes of my eating disorder. I have given up the dieting, restriction, binge cycle – all with Shelley’s intuitive guidance. I am in self/care and working on the deeper thoughts that have kept me stuck for SO long. I have found Shelley to be knowledgable, needs based and as I said earlier incredibly intuitive. I cannot recommend her highly enough. I have so many tools/strategies to use as well. She is always close by if needed. If you are wanting to get out of BED and begin to experience freedom with food or you have gotten stuck and need help, then I truly encourage you to reach out to Shelley. She’s been there, she knows, she understands and she knows how to get out of it.- Annette

Throughout the years I’ve worked with a variety of coaches, therapists and tried out different programs related to my issues with food and it wasn’t until I worked with Shelley that I was able to identify what was at the root of my habits and patterns. By identifying the triggers, I was able to see clearly what was driving my crazy behavior around eating and dieting that had kept me in a painful spiral over the years and why so many other attempts at treating had failed. Shelley has a relatable and real approach to her work and she would be my go-to for anyone struggling with any food related issues. Ali V.

Click here: http://emergingjewel.com/12-week-program-to-healthy-eating/

To see more, check this link for my video!

https://youtu.be/El-vIDHlekY

Please don't hesitate with any questions at all, and feel free to contact me at : shelley@emergingjewel.com

I look forward to having you with us!

This time of year can be very stressful for many…expectations and demands mixed with the abundance of food everywhere often raise levels of overwhelm and discomfort, especially for a compulsive overeater.Problematic Eaters talk about just “getting through the holidays”, beating the battles of food cravings and the extra demands that seem to create levels of stress that feel unbearable.Difficult family interactions, holiday loneliness, the overwhelming amount of food everywhere and an expectation to feel “happy” and engaged in the “spirit” can trigger anxiety, frustrations… AND a trance state that leads to compulsive overeating, bingeing or other self destructive behaviours.

If you are feeling stressed about the upcoming holiday season, check out my: 10 tips for managing holiday cravings!

1. ONE HOUR AT A TIME- This is a powerful way to keep things simple and present over the holiday season. Take it one hour at a time. Don’t worry about what you are going to do at dinner time at noon, or obsess about the holiday party two days form now. Stay present and plan each hour as it comes. This works hand in hand with the powerful tool of eating every 3-4 hours to create a regular pattern of eating and avoiding the binge cycles. 2. JUST SAY NO. – Firm boundaries with friends and families over the holidays may be needed to maintain a healthy balance and a sufficient level of self care over the holidays. If you are feeling overwhelmed at a Christmas party, let the guests know you have to leave early as soon as you arrive! Plan to take breaks as needed and say NO to events that feel triggering, especially if it involves dysfunctional dynamics. There are NO should’s that are appropriate here. Taking apart the ‘stories” that are created around what is expected at this time of year can be empowering to say the least. Honour yourself- honour your body…never eat for someone else. You deserve it- this year…do it different! 3. PLAN BUT DON’T DIET- BIG difference between these two…and I offer an entire course on this concept, but for starters, make a decision that you will not be hard on yourself during this time. Decide that you are going to have a plan around what you will eat and when but allow for movement and flexibility. being PRESENT and conscious allows you to do just this. Perhaps you plan to eat a treat at a certain time of day, or decide ahead of time what you will and will not eat at an event. Be gentle, and remember that you can always come back to the present moment- regardless of what happens. No need to go to extremes if your plan falls apart. Simply notice it- like a behavioural experiment, and come back to the plan as soon as possible. 4. CROWD OUT- LOVE this! Instead of creating lists of foods that you must AVOID, make sure you include a healthy fruit or vegetable at every meal. Doing so, you crowd out the foods that are not so beneficial and the body tends to start to crave different flavours and food groups. 5. BRING SOMETHING TO SNACK ON- Plan for success! Bring along something to keep yourself occupied with at a party or event hat is something tasty you enjoy that can be your ” treat” for an evening? Instead of telling yourself you won’t eat anything at the event, bring along something that works for you! 6. TAKE SPACE– Take a break as often as necessary over the holidays. Taking a walk or removing yourself from the immediate crowd can help in bringing your attention back to the present and getting conscious again. Decide that you will do whatever it takes to stay present and in self care wherever you are! 7. CARRY WATER- Having a glass of hot water and lemon on hand is very helpful- or a water bottle if that works. Drink more water than you are used to drinking. It keeps your hands busy and your body full! 8. MINDFUL BREATH- Deep belly breathing is not only a powerful tool in stabilizing the nervous system, but it also changes your thinking as it brings the attention back to the present where awareness and conscious thought can take place. Set your timer on your phone to practice mindful belly breathing throughout the day and evening. This is a 3 part breath that starts at the bottom of the belly, moves into the ribcage, then the throat..rather that a shallow throat breath. 9. TEA!- Tea is a wonderful dessert option. Pack tasty teas in your bags for parties and always have it available in your home. Adding milk/almond milk and stevia/honey is an option also! 10. RE-DIRECT YOUR THINKING-When you catch yourself falling into negative thinking, take space and begin to question your thoughts. Is this thought true? Am I really stuck here? Even though I have gone off course with food today, does this really mean I have failed or can I decide that I am in a learning curve and simply stat over each moment. What can I do to shift things here?…Then- take that action! Maybe its calling a friend, taking space, or setting a boundary.

We are launching a new online program for Problematic Eaters in January which is already filling up, for more information contact Shelley at : shelley@emergingjewel.com for a complimentary session to see if its a fit for you- freedom starts now!

Health Professionals, Stay tune for updated programs in the new year, and for discounts, contact me before Dec 30th, 2015!

Have a wonderful Holiday Season, from my heart to yours!

Negative self-talk can literally keep someone STUCK in emotional and compulsive eating…and in a depressive or anxious state!….and it attacks all of us at some point. Not only that, it is the number one reason your clients can't MAINTAIN weight loss and health efforts that you spend hours guiding them through! The road to real FREEDOM with food is one of self-discovery. When someone is struggling with keeping up with healthy habits, they are likely dealing with cognitive skeletons in the closet. 

Professional Coaches use this proven system because it is based on empirical evidence, and it works! If your clients are struggling with emotional eating, they have some "thought" that is getting in their way! In the same way I will outline below, you can guide your clients to freedom, having them SEE their distorted thinking and BREAK FREE of the behaviours that come along with that!

Do any of these beliefs sound familiar?…

Can I really do this?

I’m not disciplined enough?

What if I’m too weak?

Nothing ever works?

I have tried everything and I always go back to emotional eating?

What if I don’t have what it takes to persist?

What if I’m just "addicted " to food?

Im a failure?

On and on…

Here’s the thing colleagues…even if some of these thoughts have a grain of truth in them, it’s the repetitive nature of the thought and its corresponding behavior that really stops anyone from breaking free of old patterns.

I know when I was stuck in my negative food patterns, I literally had negative self-talk hundreds of times a day!

So, it’s time to get real. If you want to truly SERVE people with a lifestyle of health and happiness, you’re going to have to deal with the negative self-talk that comes up.  They MUST face it..or they will ALWAYS fall back into old patterns….

So Im going to show you HOW….Right here and now. Our Professional Cognitive Program for coaches goes intimately into this work. Hundreds of health professionals are now using it in their practice and having SUCCESS with clients..not for a week or a month- but LONG term success- years of freedom! Testimonials from this kind of work are like no other- and it feels GOOD to help shift someone life RADICALLY! This is not about "Psychology"..its not enough to KNOW what the negative thoughts are..there must be a behavioural change in order for ling term healing to happen.

For more on how to USE this work with clients, I am offering our Professional Coaching Program at discount, one FINAL time this year ( due to many requests).

It is only open until Dec 13th!

See more here: PROFESSIONAL COGNITIVE COACHING PROGRAM

Now….

Here are 8 simple steps you can use with clients  to destroy the negative self-talk so they heal for good and you can enjoy the process!… 

If you don’t take this seriously in your practice, and you put off dealing with this demon, you’re going to swim way upstream for a long time. Its too much WORK to hold your clients hands while they continue to fall- and it just doesnt work.

Have your clients…

1. Make a list of all of the negative self-talk. It doesn’t matter if it’s about food or not. List every single one. They may have 10 or they may have 100.

2. Check off all of the beliefs that pertain to food. The key here is to not overthink this. If they have a belief that they suck, it’s likely going to play out in some way in relation to emotional eating.

3. Create a spreadsheet and in the first column label it Negative Beliefs. Enter all of the negative beliefs that they checked off in a hierarchical fashion. For instance, if the strongest negative belief is “ I will never be able to lose weight, I will always go back to emotional eating".

And so on…

4. Label the second column:  Old Behavior. Starting with your strongest negative belief enter the main behavioral response that results from the belief. If your belief is, " I will never lose weight, I will always go back to emotional eating",  behavior might be “ never trying anything different other than the same "quick fix" diet methods that just don't work."

5. Label the third column:  New Behaviors. Create a different response. It’s hard to control thoughts. Instead of getting rid of the intrusive thought, “I will never be able to lose weight longterm, I will always go back to emotional eating".” try to imagine new behaviors. Enter alternatives to diet regimes. For instance, “Im ready to deal with what is under my emotional eating (my distorted thinking) so it can be gone for good."

Label the fourth column Deadline.

6. Set a date for the full behavioral change. Stick to it. Make sure when they recognize the self-limiting thought on a day-to-day basis, it’s time to take action with the new behavior. It might seem paradoxical at first, but change doesn’t usually feel comfortable.

7. Label the fifth column: Resolved Self-Talk. Once they have had consistent experiences with changing behavior, enter a new belief that more accurately represents who you are. For instance, change “I will never be able to lose weight for good, I will always go back to emotional eating".,” to “Its possible I will learn how to change my thinking and therefore finally be done with emotional eating".

8. Label the sixth column: Celebrate. Once you’ve resolved a particular negative belief, celebrate in some way. Go to a movie. Go out for a special meal. NURTURE!

With any questions on this process, please don't hesitate to contact me. I look forward to reading your comments below on how this works in your practice! Don't forget to share if this is useful :)

We hope to have you join us this year to take this work to another level! Don't wait as I have limited space as individual work is involved :)    Register here! Cognitive Coaching Program

Many people believe that emotional eating is about a lack of control and an inability to regulate oneself.  

I don’t buy it.

If that were the case, we could simply be taught to “control the beast” and all would be well. Emotional eating falls on a spectrum that can lead to eating disorders but often lies outside of the boundaries of the DSM5, the diagnostic manual therefore while people suffer incredibly, they don’t believe its ‘serious” enough to deal with. Any emotional eater knows that it can hinder a functional, happy life and lead to isolation, depression and low self esteem. The torture of diets, food plans, weigh- ins, and constant obsession of food cannot be “controlled” but it can be transformed. 

So why is it so hard to stop Emotional Eating?

1. Body Shame- Most people will say that they will begin to love their bodies AFTER they lose the weight, after they follow the “diet”, or after they start seeing some progress. The truth is: body shame is a CAUSE of emotional eating. It is very difficult to be in a positive space of change and transformation when you are stuck in the negativity and self doubt created by body shame. You must begin to change your thinking and therefore your emotional body before your physical body can shift! This is why diets never work- nor do they last..people are putting the cart before the horse on this one! Our programs are focused on changing the DISTORTED thinking that has people STUCK in emotional eating. This is a very in depth proven system that has deep patterns acknowledged and BROKEN. In this way, emotional eating is eradicated..for good! For more on that, check our programs for coaches and clients here:  http://emergingjewel.com

2.Unconscious Mindset- When you are conscious, you have choice! Some behaviors of an unconscious eater may be an inability to stop eating when they are full, a desire to eat what is in front of them, even if they don’t want it, or coming out a binge not knowing what just happened. Slowing down and avoiding self judgement can help here…but there are proven steps to bring a problematic eater out of UNCONSCIOUS eating to CONSCIOUS eating, and they are about ACTION! To get conscious and break this cycle, most people need to develop a regular pattern of eating and tools to stay present and focused on a daily basis. This is not so easy when overeating or dieting has become a way of life. Learning how to plan WITHOUT dieting is KEY here, as well as uncovering the thoughts and feelings that come up at each eating episode. In this way, patterns can be identified and cognitive restructuring can be sued to shift and transform these stuck behaviours.

3.Food is THE source of Happiness- When eating becomes the most desired self care tool, emotional eating has set in. In order to let go of the desire to compulsively eat, there must be a desire to take care of oneself phsycially, emotionally, and mentally. If there are blockages in this area then usually thinking must be adjusted using a cognitive behavioral approach and then implementing action in this area becomes like second nature. There are no foods that are inherently bad, but bad choices have people eat toxic food in excess. When you are conscious, you are able to decide what is a healthy choice and what is not. Moderation becomes possible here. Finding other sources of pleasure and nourishment is beneficial, but looking at deeper reason of self destruction is also imperative.

4.Codependent Food Trap- Many women who suffer from disordered eating patterns also struggle with saying NO.I was one of them… and it has been a process of letting go of what I thought I NEEDED to do and really acting only from my heart and truth.Was it wrong if I didn't visit family over holidays? Aren't I SUPPOSE to I sit with an old friend who wants to be in her drama and is not looking for solution ? Am I a "bad" person for turning down a call for someone who wanted me to come over when I was exhausted from a long day and needed to rest ?

Living life based on what you "should do" is always going to result in some kind of negative self sabotage …When you are living your life to please someone else- when you are not saying NO, when you are spending all of your time taking care of everyone else…the food WILL get LOUD ! At some point in time the body and mind begin to say NO in their own way… a food binge, depression, and active anxiety episodes start to become the norm.Sometimes we don't even realize how many " should's " we have running our lives !

I " should" lose my winter weight. I " should" be able to stick with this cleanse. I "should" have closer relationships with family…

Living in the SHOULD"S was a big part of what kept me STUCK in disordered eating. Never feeling like I was "doing" enough, or "being" enough. I SHOULD spend less, I SHOULD work harder, I SHOULD have children by now, I SHOULD make healthier food choices….it was never ending. I had a set of beliefs…some old files in my mind around what I believed "worthy' looked like…what "accomplished" was.

It wasn't until I became conscious of how the SHOULD'S in my life were actually destroying my ability to THINK BETTER that everything began to change-

Steps to letting GO of the SHOULD!

•  Write down  " should" statement ( your trigger thought). EX: I should exercise every day. What is your reaction to this statement ? In other words, what feelings, thoughts, and behaviours does this statement ignite ? ( EX:"This makes me feel stressed, anxious, guilty, bad about myself, pressured, it makes me want to eat badly when I don't follow though." )
• How can you change this statement so that it is NOT a "should "statement, and so that you are treating yourself with the highest respect, and putting yourself FIRST.(Ex: I will plan to exercising three times this week because that is healthy and makes me feel good.
• If I choose differently to honour myself and my body in that moment then that is great also. My first priority will be checking in with how I am feeling and what I need.)

5.Mental Detox- Get rid of the detox mentality when it comes to food! It will only create more black and white thinking and extremes if you are a problematic eater. Sticking to a regular plan of eating is essential. Instead, detox your thoughts! What thoughts do you have influencing your self esteem throughout the day? Write down your thoughts for 3 days every time you eat. Notice what is there- you will be surprised!

From here you can use the cognitive behavioural approach to shift and change those! For more info, check out our discounted programs here! : http://emergingjewel.com

 If you work with emotional eaters, and most coaches do…or you suffer yourself, the most important tip to remember is…its NOT about the food! When you use the specific tools in the proven system, thoughts change and behaviours with food are transformed…for good!

Please share if you know someone this might serve and don't hesitate to contact me with any questions at all at : shelley@emergingjewel.com

I look forward to reading your comments below!

 

Drained, Burnt Out …..and Starting to Hate Coaching…..I have had many requests so am offering this program early! I hear all too often from coaches, therapists, and healers, teachers, and others in the helping profession about experiencing burnout. While being overworked is a real issue, many do not realize that the draining part of the work is not simply by clocking hours…but by giving in a way that is about sacrificing oneself to "help" another. When I learned how to be a FACILITATOR rather than a HELPER my life changed- not only in my business but in all areas of life. I realized it was not my job to HELP but to facilitate another's OWN journey. In this way,we empower our clients to do the necessary work for their own transformation, rather than hand holding- which only promotes a victim mentality and serves neither the coach nor the client. Learning how to use the cognitive behavioural approach not only helped me serve thousands in the emotional and compulsive eating community, but it in fact DOES THE WORK FOR ME. I don't feel drained after coaching sessions- in fact I feel inspired, alive and rejuvenated. I don't have to "figure out" what to do, because the client is shown step by step in the work in the way that is perfect for where they are at. They decide what comes next., and they transform because of the process..not because of me. This is what I want- I want to get clients out the door as fast as possible so they feel empowered to live their lives WITHOUT my help. In this way, I truly serve those who are ready and willing to show up for themselves. This is not an easy task, but truly powerful. Im now sharing my work and feel it necessary in a time when those in the service industry are feeling drained, burnt out..and beginning to hate there jobs. Its sad to see good coaches walking away from the work…and I want to share another way. The next Cognitive Coaching Program starts NOV 1, 2015 I am teaching this program on a regular basis now for the Canadian School of Natural Nutrition and it is the basis for my latest book, " Food Freedom" .

If you work with people who struggle with food- and you want to learn a new coaching technique that you can use in ALL areas of your business and personal life, and begin to LOVE your work again then I invite you to join us. With any questions, don't hesitate to ask : Shelley@emergingjewel.com * This is an online program that can be DONE AT YOUR OWN PACE.

http://emergingjewel.com/attention-health-practitioners/

With so many diets, cleanses and new nutritional bad guys lurking around grocery store aisles, it can be easy to start obsessing about our eating habits. In my experience, Problematic Eaters tend to start the cycle of suffering with OBSESSION! When I was asked about problematic eating and eating disorders from Canadian Living Magazine, Here is what I had to say in the following article, along with a doctor and eating disorder specialist.

Read more below and I would be happy to hear your comments!

http://www.canadianliving.com/health/nutrition/disordered_eating_can_healthy_eating_go_too_far.php

Drained, Burnt Out …..and Starting to Hate Coaching…..I hear all too often from coaches, therapists, and healers, teachers, and others in the helping profession about experiencing burnout. While being overworked is a real issue, many do not realize that the draining part of the work is not simply by clocking hours…but by giving in a way that is about sacrificing oneself to "help" another.

When I learned how to be a FACILITATOR rather than a HELPER my life changed- not only in my business but in all areas of life. I realized it was not my job to HELP but to facilitate another's OWN journey. In this way,we empower our clients to do the necessary work for their own transformation, rather than hand holding- which only promotes a victim mentality and serves neither the coach nor the client. Learning how to use the cognitive behavioural approach not only helped me serve thousands in the emotional and compulsive eating community, but it in fact DOES THE WORK FOR ME.

I don't feel drained after coaching sessions- in fact I feel inspired, alive and rejuvenated. I don't have to "figure out" what to do, because the client is shown step by step in the work in the way that is perfect for where they are at. They decide what comes next., and they transform because of the process..not because of me. This is what I want- I want to get clients out the door as fast as possible so they feel empowered to live their lives WITHOUT my help. In this way, I truly serve those who are ready and willing to show up for themselves. This is not an easy task, but truly powerful. They continue to refer others my way- because I work in integrity.

Im now sharing my work and feel it necessary in a time when those in the service industry are feeling drained, burnt out..and beginning to hate there jobs. Its sad to see good coaches walking away from the work…and I want to share another way.

The next Cognitive Coaching Program starts Sept. 1st.

I am teaching this program on a regular basis now for the Canadian School of Natural Nutrition and it is the basis for my latest book, " Food Freedom" . If you work with people who struggle with food- and you want to learn a new coaching technique that you can use in ALL areas of your business and personal life, and begin to LOVE your work again then I invite you to join us.

With any questions, don't hesitate to ask : Shelley@emergingjewel.com

In Service,

Shelley :)

See the link here:

http://emergingjewel.com/attention-health-practitioners/ * This is an online program that can be DONE AT YOUR OWN PACE!! 

As we know, being a mom is one of the most selfless acts you will ever undertake. There is no “pause” button you can press. Many moms find it challenging to keep up with self-care when there is so much else to take care of, and weight gain is often a side effect of this overwhelming dilemma! So how do you tend to the world and still have time to take care of you?

The answer is not simple, but easy: learn how to be selfish!

This may sounds ridiculous, with often work and career demands, mouths to be fed, and laundry piling up each day, but if you want to come back into a healthy body, mind and spirit, getting rid of the “self sacrifice” attitude is the first and most important step.

I wanted to share with all you mom's out there a post I wrote that was recently published with NorthShore Mama which shares how to break free from the self sacrifice and embrace freedom as a mom for good….cuz you deserve it!

Click on the link below, and let me know what you think!

http://northshoremama.ca/a-busy-moms-solution-to-weight-gain-be-selfish/

Mom's in todays world are under a lot of pressure and its time we speak up and make a change! Its ok NOT to be superwoman, its ok to get a nanny and go to a yoga class…everyday! Its ok to say NO when you need to…would love to hear what you are doing to STAY SELFISH mom's :)

As a wellness counsellor  I hear so often how hard it is when you are hit with that mid afternoon crash and cravings set in. The morning coffee has run dry, and boredom or stress is a common occurrence at this time of the day. Its also a time where habits are formed which are hard to break once patterns become ingrained. What most people who suffer from compulsive, stress, emotional or even boredom eating do not realize is that the "food trance" starts one before you take that first compulsive bite. What I mean by a food trance is that space of compulsive eating when you are not totally conscious it is happening until it ends. When you begin to have the fist thought of eating compulsively…the thought of your favourite treat, the trance has begun. This does not mean that you cannot eat any of your favourite foods and you have to pack carrots every afternoon though. This simply means you want to train your brain to be conscious at all times.

So how do you stay free of that mid afternoon snacking that can easily "ruin the day" in a few compulsive bites?

1. Eat Breakfast: Yes, I know this sounds simple- and unlikely that it would interfere with afternoon snacking but in fact studies have shown that those who do not east breakfast (within 2 hours of waking up) have a much higher probability of bingeing later on.

2. Plan your Afternoon Snack:  and Make it GOOD!- So if you know that mid afternoon is a time of craving, for whatever reason- plan a snack at this time that you actually look forward to having! Come prepared! Choose something that does not "set you off", but is something you will feel happy to eat :)  When you plan ahead in this way, you stay conscious.

3. Drink Water:  Drinking a lot of water through the day is not only important for re-hydration, but it also tells the brain that you are providing nourishment and self care…and its hard to go to the opposite extreme when you are in "nourishment" mindset. Adding lemon or fruit to your water can be fun here- especially in the summer! In the winter, I love fresh ginger tea :)

4. Develop a Nourishment Attitude rather than a Diet Attitude: The last point ties in perfectly here. When you make a decision to nurture YOU- that means no more restriction, denial, punishment, guilt or shame..then everything changes. It really is this dramatic. When you decide that you will give yourself a treat and do it in a way that is about love and nourishment, you do not need to go overboard. There is an acceptance and peace around food and the afternoon becomes another opportunity to welcome this process.

5. Exercise: This does not need to be extreme, but planning to do something that moves the body everyday will motivate the self care mindset. Not only does it get the endorphins going but it creates a mindset that is about health rather than self destruction. This can be anything at all from running, walking, nature trails, yoga, sports  or something softer like chi gong or tai chi, which also help with calming the mind immensely.

6. Meditation- You do not need to sit cross legged for an hour every morning to reap the benefits of daily meditation. What happens when you give yourself the time and space to get quiet and be with the present moment, even if only for five minutes in the morning is an awareness and presence that flows throughout the day. Start simply by sitting comfortably and watching the breath. Just notice the inhale and notice the exhale as it comes, without trying to manipulate the breath at all. When the mind is active simply notice and acknowledge the active mind, but continue to draw your attention to the breath. You cannot do anything wrong here. The mind will wander, but being able to continually come back to breath will come in handy when you feel as though you are losing control throughout the day.

7. Make Lunch Count- Eating a lunch high in protein and healthy fats will keep the blood sugar level and provide you with the energy you are looking for to get through the afternoon feeling at ease. Complex carbohydrates such as brown rice are the best choice for adding carbs and chewing each bite fully will provide your digestive system with the fire it needs for long term energy.

8. NOTE Your Emotional Cravings- When you feel that hit of a craving coming on, write down what you are thinking and feeling at that moment. Keeping note of this for a week at each eating period is also very helpful in noticing patterns and starting to get at what is underneath your hunger pangs.

For more tips such as these be sure to follow me here:

Emerging Jewel Facebook

I look forward to hearing how you deal with afternoon cravings below. If this serves, don't hesitate to share :)

One of the most common characteristics of a problematic eater is an inability to speak up. I see women who do not speak their truth, and live in a place that is not in alignment with their value systems and highest good all too often in my practice. There is no guilt or shame in being stuck in this place. I for one, lived it for many years. When you are not connected to yourself, and feel disconnected to the world, it is very difficult to speak up and create healthy boundaries with others, never mind share what you feel and need from one moment to the next.

The Vishuddha chakra sits at the throat level and is often associated with the thyroid gland in the human endocrine system. It also has a strong connection to truth and living in alignment with what serves you. This gland is in the neck, and produces hormones essential for growth and maturation. Excessive stress, namely fear and fear from speaking out, affect the throat chakra and thyroid problems may occur.

When you begin to take down the walls of problematic eating, you develop an intimate relationship with yourself. You begin to realize that you cannot settle. Not in any area of  life. No matter what happens, you have to honour yourself. The healing that comes from this process is powerful, not only on a psychological and emotional level, but of course it transforms the body on a physical level as well.

Healing Problematic eating will light a fire in you.

Its not something you have any control of. When you make the decision to do whatever it takes to live in your highest truth, you have no option but to create the most loving relationship with food as possible.- and more importantly with yourself.

Its like any relationship you have. It takes conscious effort, love, compassion and dedication. Its much easier than our minds make it up to be. When you live life in a place of your highest truth, it doesnt mean there isn't pain sometime, or sorrow.

But what is amazing is that it shifts…. and growth is inspiring and addictive, and worth it.

What can you do in today to shift more into truth? Is there anything that does not feel in alignment with your highest truth? What action steps will you take right now to change this? 

I would love to hear below! 

I struggled with food for 15 years. I hated myself, and I thought it would never end- ever.

I have now been completely free from restriction, compulsive overeating, binge eating, bulimia, orthorexia, overexercising, obsessing, low self worth and body image issue.

….Completely free. And you can be too.

When you make a decision to HEAL and to surrender to the "fight against" food", your life changes in miraculous ways. This has been my experience. Freedom unfolds not only on your plate, but in places you least expected! Relationships transformed, friendships strengthened and a deep knowing of peace and trust emerges in your day to day life. For this I am in deep gratitude. I suffered for many years thinking that if I just "controlled" MORE, if I just "tired" HARDER things would be ok. I would beat this. Eventually I began to think that I would never get well; that this was something I would struggle with for life.

If you truly WANT to heal, and you understand that it is not about the food, you can absolutely end this battle once and for all. I finally came to a place of surrender in my own life- a place where I was willing to do whatever it took to let go of the battle once and for all. It was a journey of courage and strength and it has brought more gifts than I could ever imagine..mostly a deep connection with my own spirit and a yearning to bring myself to a deeper place of love every step of the way.

Today I am eternally thankful for this and I invite you to look at how far you have come, regardless of where you are at right now. Thank yourself deeply for continuing to show up FOR YOU. Thank yourself for your spirit, your strength, your courage and the incredible temple that has you here every day on this planet- your BODY!

Most of you know I have published my program and it is now available online. I have been walking groups through this program in a very detailed and intimate setting. This is all done online with a great deal of 1:1 work and support. For a problematic eater, the book is only a beginning- the program will help you take your healing to another level.

For Amazon link, :click here 

So WHAT is Problematic Eating?

Problematic Eating is a term that describes any situation whereby a person is not able to eat without stress of some kind. Usually, but not always, this person is also overly concerned with weight and shape, or has a strong concern about how one looks. A person with Problematic Eating will experience emotional, environmental, cognitive and/or interpersonal triggers that will lead them to act out in behaviors that are destructive around food. Eating emotionally, because of feelings, is one factor that may exist and/or eating compulsively, in a trance state, consuming food long after the point of being full.

Often, a problematic eater will experience episodes of eating compulsively, and often experience Binge Eating. This is when one is rapidly eating large amounts of food at one sitting. Usually there is some restriction going on before the binge (but not always) and therefore psychologically the body and mind want to make up what was missed. If restriction is not present, then binging itself becomes the focus and a person will move into this trance state at every eating episode, often eating alone because of embarrassment, and shame.

If you are ready; If it is your time; If you have had enough; If you are sick and tired of being sick and tired… then I invite you to join us!

The next interactive online program ( with interactive conference calls) begins JULY 6 and it is open for registration NOW! This is a small group of women who gather weekly and the program is a very hands on intensive which has you shifting old ideas and starting new habits right from day 1 ! It will FILL UP fast, so don't wait on this one. I want to keep it small to ensure that everyone has a lot of 1:1 time on each call.here is a glance at what we will be covering :

12-Week Outline:

Week 1- Community

Food Diary
 Connection Commitment to Recovery

Week 2- Restriction/ Overeating and Healing

Throw Away the Scale Inner Perfectionist Food Diary

Week 3- Food Plan

Food Plan Verses Diet Danger Foods Meal Planning

Week 4- Spiritual Dilemma

Change Your Thinking Connect with your Deepest Self A Spiritual Solution

Week 5- Undernourished Body

Crowding Out
 Cravings and Deficiency
- How to "Nourish" and Replenish Exercise

Week 6- Mindfulness and Food

Mindful Eating Disassociation and Food Breath and Connection

Week 7- Stress and Recovery- Why You Do It

Stress and Food Change Perception Self Esteem and Body Image

Week 8- Triggers and Food- A Deeper Look

Triggers and Distorted Thinking What are you HUNGRY for? A Deeper Look at : Loneliness and Anger

Week 9- Boundaries, Codependence and Food

Are you a " Caretaker”? Do you " Self Sacrifice”? People Pleasing and Food Week 10- Self Esteem and Your Thoughts

What "Story" Keeps You Stuck Negative Thinking Thoughts and Hunger

Week 11- Guilt, Shame and Your Thoughts

Updating Old “Files” Letting go of Guilt and Shame Body Compassion

Week 12- Relapse Prevention

Long Term Stress Management
 Maintenance and Prevention Plan MASTER Problematic Eating- Not Just COPING!

In gratitude for you all and for this work I am offering an extra 1:1 session with me ( $95 value) for those of you who sign up before THIS coming Tuesday!

Please click the link below now for details….and remember you must contact me to participate in the initial interview to see that this is a fit for you. : 12 week program

If not THIS- what ? If not now, WHEN?

Please share with those this may serve and I look forward to hearing from you soon!

Health Professionals and Friends! If you are a Health Professional wanting to learn the Cognitive Behavioural Approach- this is for you!  Course starts June 24th!

12 Weeks to recover from Emotional and Compulsive Eating… at a DISCOUNT PRICE, for a limited time!

Help your clients COMMIT to their nutritional programs!

Health Professionals who work with women with emotional or compulsive/ stress eating and are looking for a program of recovery- I am now sharing my work!

I have been using this 12 Week Program with great success the past several years and have now published this program. I am training others who wold like to learn the cognitive behavioural approach to ending the emotional component associated with problematic eaters. This is not for people with eating disorders only- this is for EVERYONE!

This is not simply a “psychology or self help program- …this is a done for you 12 Week Program that gives you ALL THE TOOLS to facilitate a transformation in your clients thinking so that they can heal the problematic eating issues.

WHAT Health Professionals ARE SAYING…

"A great resource for nutrition practitioners to help to dig into the emotional issues behind client’s poor eating habits. It not only helps practitioners to get to the why but has strategies that can be applied to help clients push through their emotional issues with food.- Nikki

"I was at a dead end with my ability to serve my clients with deep disordered eating struggles, and I reached out to Shelley for help. I joined her Cognitive Coaching Program because I knew there was something I was missing that would serve my clients. My intuition led me to the right place, but it wasn’t until working with Shelley that I really developed a new level of insight and confidence in working in the area of disordered eating. Many of my clients sail through without this need, but for the ones who are more stuck, even when they know what to do and why, now I have the ability to help them find freedom for good. I’m already seeing great results with my clients, and feel the potential throughout my business will only grow. Shelley was incredibly generous, supportive, clear and skilled in delivering this new content to me. She clearly believes in what she’s doing, and wants to serve as many people as she can. That’s the most authentic business I can imagine, and I’m thrilled I found her. – Diana Pagnucco

Health Professionals Everywhere are Wanting to Learn this Work!

For more information, click on the link below!

Click Here for the Professional Program!

We are also starting our 12 Week Program for Problematic Eaters on July 6th! If you think you are a Problematic Eater, but are not sure that this is a fit for you, feel free to contact me for a complimentary session to find out : Shelley@emergingjewel.com

Click Here for more Details on the 12 Week Program!

I trust you are all having an amazing start to the summer… loving your body and mind right up!

Well, its that time of year again…. Media is fast and strong around obtaining the perfect summer body…tanned, toned and slim are the high profile words on every second billboard and commercial. The diet and "counting calories" industry is in full swing…and I am curious about just how much all of this really serves?

I'm all about being healthy. Like everyone, I want to feel good in my body and I like to feel attractive. On some level- we all want this. We all want to feel confident. We all want strength. We all want acceptance and acknowledgment. And we all want to feel good in our skin.

But its time for a NEW paradigm around shape, weight and body image. Its just time. The quick fix, diet industry has created nothing but a population of paranoid of women (and men) who are paranoid about staying beautiful and young, struggling to keep up with the next "hottest" trend on the market.

Women globally have truly been stuck in a paradigm that suggests that food is the enemy- and if they could just stop eating that danger food, everything would be ok. They are led to believe they will lose the weight, feel good, and be appreciated by society…and therefore themselves. But is this so?

There is another way. There is a way to be healthy, strong, confident, and desirable. Its not about restriction, denial, or self punishment. Yes you can let go of foods that are not serving your body but you don't need to swear them off as a solemn oath- only to eat them in guilt and shame later. You can enjoy life, AND be healthy! 

You CAN have it all!

So how do you get this "summer body" - which really means healthy body that is unique only to you ( thats what's so great about it!) 

First of all get off the quick fix, diet mentality roller coaster and start embracing WHO YOU ARE!

1. Decide- Decide you are ready to embrace who you are. Decide that this year you are not falling into the trap of the summer" diet"mentality. Do it different! The ironic thing is, when you begin to let go of this and start to look at what is causing your unhealthy eating patterns, the weight comes off!

2. Water - This seems so simple but its a tool that I suggest using not as a "diet tip" but as a nourishment tip. Water is cleansing. Most of our body is made of water. Carry a water bottle and make it exciting! Add lemon or fruit occasionally and set a timer if you have a hard time remembering to drink it. This will help with hunger and cravings as well!

3. Crowd Out- A wonderful tool for getting off the diet cycle and simply bringing nourishment into your life! Crowd out the toxic foods by simply adding more healthy ones to your diet. Load up on the side salad at lunch, add an extra serving of veggies at dinner and plans to eat your "that " along side a healthy option!

4. Mental Detox- Get rid of the detox mentality when it comes to food! It will only create more black and white thinking and extremes if you are a problematic eater. Sticking to a regular plan of eating is essential. Instead, detox your thoughts! What thoughts do you have influencing your self esteem throughout the day? Write down your thoughts for 3 days every time you eat. Notice what is there- you will be surprised! From here you can use the cognitive behavioural approach to shift and change those!

To learn more about how you can do this, feel free to contact me for a complimentary consultation!

5. Mindful Lifestyle Program- The word " mindfulness" has become trendy over the past few years but being mindful simply means being present- being in the moment, rather than worry about the past or obsessing about the future. In order to stay present with food, and out of the "trance" that has problematic eaters stuck over and over again, you need to learn how to stay present. This is possible! To break the food trance, you begin by creating a normal pattern of eating, and regulating stress and anxiety with delay breath, and cognitive restructuring. To start, create a morning practice where you are quiet and mindful for 5 minutes before you leave the house. Just breath and walk through your day, visualizing how it will flow. Then start to implement this for one minute before each meal!

For more information on how to break the food trance for good, and have a glance at our 12 week program starting July 6th : click here!

I would love to hear your thoughts…have you decided to be healthy for life? Please share if you know someone who could benefit!

What is our will? What are we surrendering it to?

Our “old will” is that place inside that feeds the delusions of your mind and keeps you stuck in problematic eating. When you begin to recover, it is easy to fall back into old behaviors and thoughts. Sometimes resistance shows up, and we find ourselves spiraling backward into old self-defeating patterns.

Surrender means coming to the winning side, letting go of needing to control the show, and just allowing things to unfold at the pace they need with all the feelings that may come with it.This isn’t an easy thing to do, and we need to remind ourselves daily that we are now ready to surrender our old, sneaky will and allow for the divine essence within us to shine. It is also about making the decision to DO things differently.

If you are really wanting to heal, are you willing to do what is required?

Practice letting go of questions, assumptions, and old negative beliefs, placing them in the hands of the divine. (This is your highest self or any other entity you wish to surrender to.) Consciously connect—through prayer, meditation, or simply a quiet space each morning—to your higher self, your consciousness, or the entity to which you call the divine to release you from your old will and be open to the bigger plan and its timing in the universe. In this place of surrender you will begin to feel an openness and expansion that creates the space for change.

This isn't a religious idea, but simply a sense of connecting with yourself intimately.

Grace…

As you begin to surrender your old will and come into some new thinking about food, shape, and weight, you will begin to witness small (and sometimes big) miracles all around you. Grace is the powerful feeling of “being in the flow” or at the right place at the right time. It is a feeling of ease and comfort that has you know that you are being guided and looked after and that all is well. Of course, grace comes into our lives at different times and in different ways, but as you continue down the road of recovery, you certainly will experience grace in many different ways. By working with your spiritual toolbox and transforming your thinking, you make room for grace to surface in your life.

“Grace is an unreasonable force; it pays no mind to what we consider difficulties. It has the power to lift you beyond your abilities and draw support into your life just as you need it.”

Have you experienced TRUE surrender with your relationship with food yet? Have you experienced GRACE in your life?

It is there waiting. It simply takes a decision to let go.

5 Steps to Surrender…

1. Make a decision that you are committed to a new way, and open to possibility.

2. Ask for help. Decide that you are worth it and ask for all the help and support you need.

3. Let go of the 'quick fix" and "diet" mentality, and adopt an understand that this is a journey, with ups and downs but that as you continue you will be successful.

4. Write down all of the negative thoughts that keep coming up that are holding you back. 

5. QUESTION all of the thoughts written above! Ask yourself:

• Is this thought true?
• Is there another possibility here that might also be true?
• What is a turn around for this thought?
• How is this thought possibly distorted? ( Is it black and white thinking, rigid, based on self sabotage?)

Please share this if it serves, and I look forward to hearing your thoughts below!

For more information on our next 12 Week course " Ending Problematic Eating"

…click the link below!

http://emergingjewel.com/12weekprogram

If you are a disordered eater, a binge eater, an emotional eater, a closet eater, a compulsive over eater, or any type of  problematic eater..then nutrition and exercise are NOT your solution. Im not saying they are not helpful…but they are not the answer.

Of course, physically healing the body is important, but without healing the emotional and mental body, a permanent healing cannot take place. There is a deep interconnection among all four aspects of our being, and the spiritual component of recovery has been shown to be very important. Positive thinking, constructive self-behaviours, and a decline in body and shape obsession are strongly linked with spiritual recovery. 

The word “spiritual” here doesn’t mean religious. What we’re talking about is a connection with the highest spirit in your life—a conscious connection with your deepest self. This connection may be through a deity such as Jesus, Allah, Buddha, and so forth, but only if that deity is what touches your deepest soul. However, a deity isn’t necessary at all. What is important here is that you are working to consciously connect with your highest self throughout the day and to stay present and aware of your actions and behaviours. Some people find this connection through nature, meditation, prayer, breath, music, dance, and so on.

So how does one connect with his or her highest source?

This is simply about training the mind to begin to see differently. As the mind shifts from a closed, confined, judgmental, confused, and distorted space to one of openness and clarity, it is only natural that you will find peace of mind as well and that positive behaviours will become effortless as result.

There is absolutely nothing “out there” that can create suffering like the diluted mind.

A mind that is stuck in very rigid, black-and-white thinking is common in the problematic eater. Instead of staying in these low, vibrational thoughts, a person has the opportunity to connect with one’s higher self and begin to see more clearly. This is the spiritual connection that heals problematic eating for life.

A connection to your truth (your needs, feelings, and emotions), faith in the ability to change your thoughts, and the willingness to do so are of utmost importance here because dysfunctional eating isn’t about what you’re eating but why.

Your thinking, therefore, creates patterns of beliefs that become so ingrained that they unconsciously determine the actions and behaviors that leave you stuck. When you are connected with your breath and conscious of the thoughts and feelings that are present, you begin to feel connected and calm in your body, a spiritual connection begins, and your mind comes out of the trance. You begin to understand the thoughts that are driving you to eat in a destructive way. In the process of listening to the body and being present, you begin to understand in a very deep way that you’re able to consciously create your minute, hour, and day the way you want it to be— including how you want to feel in your body and what you will put on your plate.

By letting go of the diet mentality and embracing truth through conscious attention to the present moment and your thinking, you are able to actually enjoy nourishing food rather than looking for the next “fix.”

Your body begins to want to eat well because you’re honoring your highest good by taking deep care of the mind in this way. You no longer have to live with rigid rules and punishing demands on yourself. In this way, you want to nourish your body because you care, and that is reason enough to be truthful and present with yourself and your food.

In our 12 Week Program, we dive into the "How's" of this component of recovery. Click here to find out more!

http://emergingjewel.com/12weekprogram

Are you a health professional who wants to learn about this work?

I am now sharing the cognitive process with other professionals who want to better serve their clients. Contact me for details on this great opportunity! ~ shelley@emergingjewel.com

I look forward to hearing your comments below! 

Food often feels like the biggest 'trigger'  for a problematic eater, and compulsive overeaters will often have a huge list of foods they must avoid and fear because of their inability to stop and eat these items in moderation. Food is not addictive. We need food. The attachment overeaters have with certain foods is not because of the food item itself, but because of the perceptions created about that particular food item. “If I eat a piece of chocolate, I will binge” is an example. Of course sensitivities to certain foods is possible, and cravings do exist but when there is no extreme, black and white thinking behind the eating episode then healthy thinking will inevitably lead to healthy behaviour around food.

If food is a trigger, then you must look at what the thinking is behind the food. It is usually very black and white. Restriction is often a precursor to food triggers. For example, if you believe that when you eat sugar you binge and that no amount of sugar is “safe” for you, you have created a very rigid thought about your ability to eat sugar “normally.” By believing this thought, you find yourself obsessing about how much sugar you have eaten and then beating yourself up when you “fail” with sugar. When you have a thought that is black and white like this, there is no room for a “middle of the road” approach. If you ate a cookie, you cannot simply acknowledge that you ate a cookie and move on with your day. With this thought, the only thing you can do is punish yourself, which tends to look like further restriction or bingeing for a problematic eater.

If you are a problematic eater then this is the time to get really honest and clear about what is showing up in your thinking when you act emotionally or compulsively with food.

See my last post on getting started on a food diary to start. If you haven’t completed the diary for at least ten days, then keep going with it and return to this place when you are ready. 

Once you’ve identified your triggers, list them below and include the “maintaining factors” (the thoughts and behaviors that keep you stuck in your destructive patterns) as well as “possible alternatives.”

Examples:

Trigger: chocolate

Alternative: Identify and shift my rigid thinking/ Get conscious

Maintaining Factor: Not staying present, eating it when I am stuck in a rigid thought pattern

In other words, eating chocolate when you are not conscious is a trigger, so an alternative is to plan is to plan to only eat chocolate for now when you are absolutely conscious and are aware of your black and white thinking.

If eating alone is your predominant trigger, look at why you need to use food as comfort. Are you reaching out to other people in your life, or do you isolate yourself? Is food your only friend? What can you do to change this dynamic, starting now? What alternative will you put in place? Are you living in guilt and shame, emotions that keep you isolated? How will you shift this tendency?

You will use this pattern for each trigger you’ve identified, whether it is food related, or otherwise.

Please let me know how this work unfolds for you. 

I don't fear any food anymore. I am completely free. I learned how to change my thinking…and so can you!

Learn how here!

If this post served you, please share! I would love to hear your thoughts below!