Neanderthal Guy Anyone ?
I admit it. Im a truth digger, an authenticity junkie of sorts.Its become apparent that my desire to BE in authenticity in all areas overflows into my working life, my family life, my relationships and...my dating life. I could be called a serial "authenticity dater". Its recently become apparent just how much a GIFT this part of my life has been ! Recently, I went out with " Neanderthal Boy". A nice guy ( always go for them), with strong values and political views ( love the passionate visionaries), who has decided to avoid the "typical mainstream" ...no job, self declared " minimalist"and who on this day was conscious of communicating to me the importance of dialogue. He mentioned non voilent communication within the first 10 minutes of our meeting ( intrigued, definately intrigued), and throws out words like commitment, communication and vulnerability. So, once again I find myself in a place of hope, inspiration, and curiosity...but this time it was different- and I loved it. Let me explain...ever been "caught" in the words and chosen to ignore what was underneath them ? How about the energy ? Or even more "fun", the lust ? Someone once described this "seeing" like a dancer staying on the right beat. Its easy to find the top melody- usually kids clap to this quite quickly- its a fast beat- too fast, and when your dancing to it you can tell very quickly that its not right. As you listen more closely, you begin to feel the "under current- the under beat". This is where the REAL dance is. This is where the connection happens. Im grateful I can FEEL the underbeat very quickly now. I can tell when someone is floating along the surface and without judgment I can easily allow them to continue, without attachment, without disappointment. I no longer need to grasp at an idea or a fantasy. I am ok- actually I am better than ok in my light, in my truth. I am clear that I love connecting with others who are grounded in the roots of their tree, not caught up in the wind in the leaves.
Have you experienced this " surface floating" in your dating life ? Amongst your community ? How does it make you feel ? How do you find real, authentic connection in your life ?